Growing up I always envied anyone who had a clear idea of what they wanted to do from childhood. A few years ago I worked with someone who discovered his passion for playing the trombone at a young age and dedicated his life to it. One time he was kind enough to give me a ride home and I shared my envy for his clarity. He had never seen it in the same way as I did: an early end to what for some is a lifelong search for identity and purpose. He smiled and said that I made it sound so poetic when in his mind it added up to years of dedication and sacrifice to join a very small, extremely competitive field. I was still envious, but it forced me to think beyond the decision and consider the work that follows.
At twenty-seven I am still completely clueless as far as what I want to be when I grow up. Every few years it shifts depending on what’s more important to me at the time my dreams or my finances. It feels defeating. I’m now a year away from graduation without a concrete plan.
Earlier this week, I was listening to The Lady Gang and during the portion of the podcast where they answer listeners questions someone asked for advice about figuring out their future. Keltie Knight’s response was encouraging. She wouldn’t have known even five years ago that The Lady Gang was going to happen, but now it’s this beautiful thing that she gets to do every week. Her advice is to keep an open mind and not put too much pressure on ‘figuring it out’ because in her words, “if you’re a good person and you work hard your life will turn out incredible no matter what.” Their guest this week Crosby Tailor shortly followed with a statement that made me pause the podcast, open a blog post draft, and immediately quote his phrase, “passion leads to purpose.”
I know that my main passion is writing. It is something that always feels right in a world where everything is so so wrong. I’m still not sure what my purpose is, but I’m hoping that if I keep writing it will reveal itself. I’m lucky to have a job that I don’t despise and could make a career out of. This allows me to follow Keltie’s advice and keep myself open and flexible for the opportunities that life may present.
We don’t have to have our whole life planned out right now. In fact it might be better if we don’t. We won’t be defeated or thrown into a complete panic if things don’t go according to our carefully planned life. We can live in the moment and embrace things as they come. There’s always something on the horizon, what will you make of it?